I know I've had a bunch of nip, but I'm sure I'm not just seeing things. THEY are here. I'm talking things like strings that aren't strings. Yep. It's long and wide and clothish, but it's certainly not string. Yep. Aliens. I don't want to be like Big Bird and Snuffleupagus or Mulder and his love life. I want to prove these things are out there. wintersweet claims she has seen it. deucelampbell saw it. assaultdoor told me to bugger off, but he's angry because poop elves deposited a bunch of poop on the couch. This stuff is pretty wild. I mean, electric lights? WTF? How can the same substance that makes toilets work also illuminate things? How can my cute little paws be SO DIRTY? It's wild or something, because it's not actually string. It's some kind of string-like alien entity, and I'm going to catch it somehow.

Two years ago today I wrote my very first post. Some things have changed, while others have somehow remained exactly the same. When I started, Walter Cronkite was still pushing people around on LiveJournal. Now he's gone. Score one for me. Bush was a threat to our national security. Unfortunately, he's still in office. Dangit. Dangit. Dangit. The world really has changed, though. Nobody can ever again break out the old stereotrope that Asian people are better at science, just like we can no longer assume that Tom Delay is always evil. With Delay off the all-mumping-villain-all-the-time list, I'm not sure where anything stands.

You've seen me at my best and at my worst. You've read my thoroughly-researched investing reports and you've see the post I made while high on catnip. I've been hooked on everything, from the Bad Ideas of Sigmund Freud cup and plate set to twelve-step programs to spider plants. Actually, as I write this, I'm going through spider plant withdrawal. I'm kind of tired, but other than that, I'm pretty sure I'm fine.

So anyhow, two years ago today was my very first post. A lot of things have changed in such a long, long time, but some things have resisted the ravages of time. Walter Cronkite, that big old bully, couldn't take the heat and has left LJ. Bush, that mumping villain, is still around. Tom Delay did something good, and let me tell you that being on the same side as Tom is enough to drive me to eating spider plants. They give quite a buzz, but since I'm sure it's not healthy, I'm giving them up. It has nothing to do with the fact that the spider plant is now well out of my reach. Withdrawal isn't that bad. I'm kind of tired, but other than that, it's about like the time I gave up giving up stuff and dove right into an orgy of sniffing glue, licking the adhesive off of 1918 inverted Flying Jenny stamps, and mace powder in my kitty box. Man, was that an expensive binge. Actually, come to think of it, this isn't anything like that. Actually, come to think of it, that never happened. No, it's more like that time Jimmy Carter and I started doing shots of catnip tea. That guy can really put that stuff away, let me tell you. Although, now that I think about it, Jimmy was pretty much a wimp. I drank him under the table. When the heck did I meet him, again?

Anyways, I'm kind of tired from withdrawal and Humphrey Bogart is telling me to get some sleep. It's been a good two years. Keep on rocking, all of you.